One Month Home

It has been a full month since our daughter landed on American soil and joined our family. Since I can't seem to compose many coherent thoughts these days, I will try to just give a few bullet points that sum up our last month...

• WE LOVE OUR DAUGHTERS!
• I'm learning more what love really means. And I had to memorize 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (the love verses) to recite to myself at times when I just want to scream.
• This is hard. Hard for us as parents, and I'm sure much harder for our daughter as she tries to adjust to a whole new life. 
• Lots of ups and downs, smiles and tears.
• It seems that what our daughter knows of American culture she learned from Cinderella, Snow White, Beyonce, Micheal Jackson, and Spiderman.
• In Ethiopia we met a very shy, quiet little girl. In America, we are getting to know a silly, loud little girl that loves to sing, dance and scream at the top of her lungs. In my ears.
• I have been praying that I would miraculously wake up one morning and be fluent in Amharic. Please?!?
• Our girls have a big age gap, but they can still make each other laugh. And they sure do make me laugh.  
• Likes: Dolls, gum, Ethiopia, movies, swimming, bread
• Dislikes: Going to bed, being told "no", wearing short sleeves or shorts
• I started to drink coffee again...sleeping is rough.
• This healing journey is going to be a long one. Buckle up.
• I am weak. But God is strong. I have seen His strength and faithfulness every single day.

Each morning when I wake up I say, "God, I can't do this on my own." And each night I can say "Thus far, the Lord has helped me".  We cherish all of the joyful times, which far outweigh the struggles. We keep reminding each other that the hard times are where God does the deepest work in our lives. And now, for the photo overload: 

We have about 98 similar model shots so far. She's a natural.

Our babies get really good medical care

Learning about our digestive system

Let's be real, there's plenty of this...

...and this beautiful angry face.

But this supergirl is strong

The joy of the Lord is my strength

Full term

Nine months ago, we saw a picture of the precious face of our daughter and knew she was ours. And right on time, she is here.  Our 9 year old, full term baby girl. (-: We are so so happy and excited that she is home!

Jet-lagged sweetie pie

Of course it's hard to sum up this surreal time, but if I had to I would go with bittersweet. Don't get me wrong, I am obviously overjoyed that she is here, with us. But as I watch her silently take in everything around her, her face gives away some of what the language barrier hides: fear, excitement, curiosity, overload, sadness, and joy too.

I cannot speak here with anything but honesty, so know that while there are definitely happy moments (that I try to catch on camera), this transition is not easy, especially for our "newborn" daughter. I can't imagine all that must be going through her head and heart right now. We are doing all we can to try to connect with her and show her what love and family means. We might be working hard for her beautiful smiles and laughs now, but I hope that someday she will know she is safe and loved and her laughter will flow freely! We are truly blessed to have the privilege of being her parents. I still can't believe it, it seems too good to be true.

First family photo at Taco Bell did not quite go as planned. ha!

 As always, your prayers are appreciated much! This beautiful, messy process of becoming a family is just beginning and we trust God to lead us daily. All of your love and kind messages has also meant so much.

Sisters are the best!

Anyone have some extra training wheels?? (-:

Listening to us butcher Amharic words is always good for a laugh

Of all our movies, she chose Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred to watch. We are going to get shredded, folks.

No more waiting!

The in-between-trips-waiting stage had gotten really hard. It just feels so wrong to leave your child half way around the world, all alone, after you just met her. We were stuck waiting for that magical phone call saying that we could go pick up our little girl. Dean, ever the optimist, woke up every morning thinking "this will be the day that they call". I, on the other hand, kept telling myself it would be AT LEAST 2 more months, no matter how many weeks passed.

But in God's perfect timing, we got that call last week! I can't believe I'm writing this, but we are going to bring our daughter home! Soon! Praise the Lord!

We miss this girl!

 As I look back over the last few years of this process, it really seems as if God just took us in His hands and carried us right to this point. Not that it has been easy, but there has always been this peace that we are following Him in this path. We have seen His faithfulness and trust that He will continue to be with us as He creates our family.

God even gave us this sweet reminder of His faithfulness last night. Well, us and everyone else in the Chippewa Valley too.

 As our daughter joins our family, we know that it will take time for that familial bond to form. We want to do all we can to teach her that WE are her family, and show her what that means. To that end, we will be laying low for a while as we spend time together and build trust. We can't wait to introduce everyone to our wonderful little girl, but we are going to be patient (not my forte) and keep our world small for a time. Thank you all for your understanding and love and prayers, we will need them now more than ever! Please keep our girl in your prayers, as her whole world will be turned upside down.

To God be the glory, great things He has done!

To Ethiopia and Back Again

I will never forget that phone call. It was a quiet Thursday morning when the phone rang and a strange number came up on the caller ID. I answered and heard our caseworker's voice, "Betsy, are you sitting down?" After several terrible thoughts ran through my head of course, she told us the exciting news that we had a court date in one week, meaning that we would have to leave for Ethiopia on Sunday. After a few whirlwind days of packing, we jumped on a plane to meet our daughter.

That trip was so much of everything: exciting, overwhelming, surreal. We fell in love with the beautiful people and country of Ethiopia. We ate a lot of good food (just not the raw meat). We saw the city of Addis Ababa and in one word, it was "lively". We soaked in the sights all around us. And oh yeah, WE MET OUR DAUGHTER!!!

Our first meeting was just as sweet and awkward as I had imagined. She met us in the courtyard of the orphanage when our van pulled in, and gave us each a shy hug as we fumbled around trying to communicate in different languages. Good thing that smiles are universal and that kids love to play... because our time with her was full of fun and smiles. I have so many precious memories of our time there with her that I hope will never fade.

Our court hearing went smoothly, and before we knew it, we were saying "see you soon" to our little lady and flying home again. We are hoping and praying to be back again in a few months to bring her home. Thank you again for your prayers as we prepare for the few final steps in this adoption process, and then start the real process of becoming a family! God has been so good to us and has been with us every step of the way. "The LORD Himself goes before you and will be with you..." (Deut. 31:8a)

A taste of heaven - CAFO 2014

I do not think I am exaggerating when I say that I believe I tasted a small bite of heaven this last week at the Christian Alliance for Orphans (CAFO) Summit in Chicago. There were no angels with wings, harps or clouds. And surprisingly there were no streets paved with dark chocolate and rivers of red wine...No, no. It was much better than that. (hard to believe, right?)

Disclaimer: I would like to blame my lack of good photography at this event on my embarrassment at being the ONLY person there whipping out a big fat old school digital camera instead of a smart phone. Not cool, people, not cool.

This was a gathering of thousands of people from 35 different nations, of all ages, backgrounds, statuses, and socioeconomic strata. Incredible diversity and creativity, different views and opinions, all woven together to form an exquisite tapestry. From stay-at-home moms to politicians to doctors to CEOs to researchers to adoptees to musicians to authors  to artists and everything in between, all united with the common purpose to worship our God. And specifically in this way: "pure and lasting worship in the sight of God means that you must care for the orphan..." (James 1:27).

This was God's church, His bride, rejoicing in Him and reflecting His image. And it was beautiful. It is often said that "imitation is the sincerest form of flattery" (or something like that?). In the case of our relationship with God, imitation is what we were created for (Romans 8:29) and is one way to worship and glorify God. God calls Himself the "Father of the fatherless" (Psalm 68:5). This doesn't mean that He sees the countless vulnerable children without families and is simply touched by their plight. He becomes a Father to them. It is much easier to care ABOUT the orphan than to care FOR the orphan. As we seek to worship God, by imitating Him, we too need to care FOR the orphan.

My missionary heroes. (who probably now think I am a crazy stalker lady...oops)

Now, I am not saying that everyone needs to adopt or foster or go work at an orphanage in Haiti. We all have a different calling that ultimately comes together for the same purpose to glorify our Father. Orphan care is not another task to add to your list of "good deeds". It is a sacred, holy, messy, challenging privilege that we can all be a part of. As one speaker said last week, "when you go near the orphan, you go near the heart of God". What a blessing and joy to walk in this calling!

Team JW

This gathering was not just a fluffy, spiritual, get-fired-up event. A big part of it was learning to grow in "wisdom and knowledge-guided love" as we care for vulnerable children. If you know what a school nerd I am, then you will understand how I loved sitting in workshops and taking notes just like the old days. (yay, powerpoints!) I have so much information to digest, I think it might take me until next year's Summit to get through it all.

KARYN PURVIS, ya'll!!!

Ultimately, I am left in awe of my Abba Father who adopted me and has been lovingly and patiently guiding me through the healing process ever since. I am humbled and honored to be able to do the same in a much smaller and imperfect way to the children He has given me here on earth. Until next year...(-:

Thank you to all who made it possible for me to go! You know who you are and you are the best.

Note to self: Re-read this post in a few months when life is really hard. And get a smart phone to take pictures.

Mystery Weekend Getaway!

Have you ever been given a gift that you felt like you didn't deserve? Like a really great gift that you could never repay? That is what happened to us last weekend when our wonderful friends the Behnkes gave us an awesomely-perfect-completely-planned-and-paid-for vacation!

Our weekend started with only knowing we were going to WI Dells and these mystery envelopes and packages.

 

If you could describe paradise in Wisconsin in winter, this is it.

Cheap happy hour margaritas overlooking the river = nice way to kick off the weekend.

View out our condo deck. Watching the sunsets might have been my very favorite part.

Surprises are so stinkin fun!

They thought of EVERYTHING!

Winery tour was amazing, I felt so classy. Until we got home and opened our usual $2.89 bottle of Aldi wine.

Dr. Evermore's Park: possibly the weirdest/most creative sculptures ever.

Which beer is best? (please tell me that someone got my Dwight/Jim joke there?!?)

We had such a hard time deciding which activity to do Saturday night: Casino, Old Time Portraits or Wett Nightclub. Obviously, we went with Wett and danced the night away. Oh Paul and Nicki, you guys are way too hilarious.

We almost went swimming outside our condo.

Knocking over pine trees, no big whoop.

Hiking!!!! Classic Dean and Betsy time.

This is how excited I was about this vacation!

Dean was also quite thrilled.

We had a weekend that we will never forget and we cannot thank our friends enough! Just wait until we send you on your African safari vacation...

God is real

Seriously, people. God is real. How do I know? Well, one of many ways I know is seeing how He has amazingly provided for our financial needs for this adoption. We are so humbled and grateful to announce that thanks to God and the generosity of so many of you, we have....(drum roll please) REACHED OUR GOAL!!! Yes, that's right! You have given exactly the amount of money that we are anticipating needing for our final expenses! Unbelievable! Of course, the adoption process is unpredictable and other expenses often arise, but we are hoping that this will be all that we need to bring our little girl home!

How did this happen? Just a few weeks ago we shared about our matching grant opportunity, and enough generous people responded that $2000 that was donated was matched by Lifesong for Orphans,. Some gave above and beyond, and we are literally brought to tears by your kindness. On top of that, just last week we received a letter stating that we have been awarded a $6000 grant through Show Hope. (I read the letter about 12 times to make sure it said what I thought it said). Say what?!?

We are still trying to process the fact that this really happened, but have learned much already including:

1. God can be trusted. We blindly trusted Him to bring in the finances, and He totally did! Without me even having to worry or try to do it with my own strength. He will do what He says!
2. The kindness of people is amazing. We have been so touched by every single person who sacrificially gave to us. Lots of good tears have been flowing in this process.
3. This has really confirmed to us that we are doing what God wants us to do. It's like He is saying to us, "You weren't sure about this adoption thing? Well here, let me miraculously provide the overwhelming amount of money you need. See, this is what I want you to do, you're adopting!"
4. We are so inspired and excited to give, give, give! Now that we know how powerful and meaningful it is to give, we can't wait to start doing the same!
5. We have a big responsibility ahead as we enter into parenting our newest daughter. Prayers are still much appreciated!

We are so amazed, humbled, speechless, grateful, encouraged, and overjoyed by all of this. There is NO WAY we could ever thank you all enough for what you have invested in our daughter's life through your donations. But I believe the promises of God and this is what He says: "You will be blessed in every way, and you will be able to keep on being generous. Then many people will thank God when we deliver your gift. What you are doing is much more than a service that supplies God’s people with what they need. It is something that will make many others thank God. The way in which you have proved yourselves by this service will bring honor and praise to God. You believed the message about Christ, and you obeyed it by sharing generously with God’s people and with everyone else. Now they are praying for you and want to see you, because God used you to bless them so very much. Thank God for his gift that is too wonderful for words!" (2 Corinthians 9:11-15)

All praise and glory belong to our awesome God! Thank you and we pray God's greatest blessings for you!

A Matching Grant!

We are so excited that we have been blessed with a matching grant from the awesome organization Lifesong for Orphans! Praise the Lord! It is just so amazing to see how He continues to provide. One year ago when we decided to start the adoption process, we were looking at a $30,000 financial hurdle to overcome. We took a rather scary step of faith that some might say was unwise, but faith looks crazy sometimes. And by God's grace and the generosity of so many beautiful people, we only have $8000 left to pay before we can bring our daughter home! A-mazing!! Praise the Lord!

We would love it if you would consider helping us raise these final expenses. Lifesong has awarded us a $2000 matching grant, with a goal to raise the entire amount by April 20th, 2014. However, funds will be accepted until the adoption is complete. Lifesong will match every donation dollar for dollar up to $2000, meaning we have the possibility of raising $4000!

Not easy. Not fun.

 It is quite humbling to ask for help, especially financial help. Ugh. But God never promised that this process would be always fun or easy, so here we are again, depending on God's provision and the generosity of others. We know that so many of you have already contributed (and we are so thankful for you by the way!), so there is no need to feel like you need to give again. No guilt trips here, folks! Although we would still appreciate your prayers...(-: If you would like to help us be able to claim the matching grant here's how:

    •    Checks should be payable to “Lifesong for Orphans". In the memo, note “family name” and “family account number” (Freerks / #4275) to assure it goes to the correct account. Please mail to Lifesong for Orphans, PO Box 40, Gridley, IL 61744. Lifesong has been blessed with a partner that underwrites all U.S. administrative and fund-raising costs (TMG Foundation and other partners). That means 100% of your donation will go directly to the adoption.
    •    To pay online go to www.lifesongfororphans.org/give/donate. Select “Give to an Adoptive Family.” Complete the online form and fill in “Family Account Number” and “Family Name” fields. Note PayPal charges an administrative fee (2.9% + $.30 USD per transaction). Your donation will be decreased by the amount of this fee.
    •    (In following IRS guidelines, your donation is to the named non-profit organization. This organization retains full discretion over its use, but intends to honor the donor’s suggested use. Individual donations of $250 or more and yearly donations totaling $250 or more will receive a tax-deductible receipt. Receipts for donations under $250 will gladly be sent upon request. Lifesong is a 501(c)3 tax exempt organization.)

Thank you for considering investing in God's Kingdom in this way. We desire above all to honor and glorify God through this journey and would love for you to join us!

Here is a letter from the Vice President of Lifesong on our behalf. I love the heart of this organization! Please read:

February 14, 2014 

Dear church, family, and friends of Dean and Betsy Freerks, 

God desires orphans of all nations to be adopted into Christ-honoring families so they can hear the Word of God and ultimately be adopted into God’s eternal family through faith in Jesus Christ. While God calls us to fulfill James 1:27 and “visit the fatherless” not all are called to adopt. Some are called to pray, some to give financially, some to go on mission trips, and some to adopt.
Lifesong for Orphans is a non-profit Christian ministry dedicated to help meet the needs of orphan children around the world, and to obey God’s call to “visit the fatherless...in their affliction” (James 1:27). With over 147 million orphans worldwide, Lifesong seeks to mobilize the Body of Christ to love and care for orphans. Lifesong serves families, churches and orphans through adoption funding. Additionally, Lifesong brings joy and purpose to orphans globally in seven countries and domestically through foster care initiatives. Please visit our website (www.lifesongfororphans.org) for more information.
Dean and Betsy have sensed God’s call to care for the fatherless and have joyfully stepped out in faith and obedience to adopt a child from Ethiopia. As you may already know, adoption can cost $25,000-$35,000, and this financial burden prevents many godly families from adopting. Lifesong believes God has called this family to adoption and has committed an Adoption Matching Grant of $2000 to help bring this child home.
Funds donated to Lifesong for Orphans will be given to help cover adoption expenses. Lifesong is a 501(c)3 non-profit organization and your gift is tax deductible. 100% of all funds raised will go directly to cover adoption costs--nothing will be taken out for Lifesong for Orphans administrative costs.
Will you invest financially in the life of this child? It will be an investment with eternal return. God bless you for laying your treasures up in Heaven.

For His Glory,
Andy Lehman Vice President

Bringing Joy and Purpose to Orphans
PO Box 40Gridley, IL 61744
P 309.747.4527F 309.747.4647 www.lifesongfororphans.org

Calm before the storm

Oops. I guess things have been a little quiet on here lately. That would be because things have been a little quiet around here lately. Adoption-wise, we are still waiting for paperwork to be processed and such before we go meet our little lady.

Dean and I have agreed that this season feels like the "calm before the storm". We can try to prepare the best we can, but who knows what a storm may bring. It's that eerie quiet of nervous/excited anticipation. Yet our hope is secure in our God who will sustain us through whatever storm passes through.

Much prayer has surrounded this time. We pray fervently for our daughter, that our Heavenly Father would protect, comfort, and be with her while we can't. We also pray that He would be preparing all of us for the upcoming transition, and that there would be healing in her heart, mind and body. We would love for you to pray with us!

And to help pass the time, we've found plenty of ways to keep busy...

Performing medical procedures on teddy bears

Creating "mega-cup"

Composing symphonies. No big deal.

Putting individual garlic cloves into ziploc bags. Umm, not my idea.

"Shoveling snow", obviously.

And the most exciting of all, WATCHING DOGS POOP IN THE NEIGHBOR'S BACKYARD!!

Thanks for your continued prayers. I'll try to be back soon. (-: